Part 6: The Power of Abandonment
Follow Up From NOSC Post
Having written the NOSC post, the information can be used to create a SOP (standard operating procedure) for those popping into a NOSC and experiencing ego death for the first time, or witnessing a friend or loved one popping into a NOSC and experiencing ego death.
Zendoproject.org specializes in psychedelic peer counseling, and based on my non-psychedelic NOSC experience, this is what a harm reduction model might look like.
I could have used peer counseling support back in 2002; the people who witnessed the transformation were in no position to help, they wanted to have me committed, and in retrospect I can’t say I blame them. This is why ***peer*** counseling is so vital.
Let’s first outline situations that could lead to a challenging ego death NOSC experience. Think twice about inducing an ego death NOSC experience if you:
have a strong sense of self that fosters “us” versus “them” attitudes and beliefs. There are many possible divisions, along the lines of gender differences, sexual preferences, religious beliefs, political beliefs, class lines, cultural / racial differences, etc.
are perfectly content and strongly tied to living in this physical world.
score a 9 or 10 on the narcissism spectrum test in the book Rethinking Narcissism. I imagine as part of the harm reduction model, peer counselors may have a handle on how to deal with this, as I can see a person flipping into either extreme - messiah complex or a complete destruction of their house of cards.
have an addiction to the dark side and a curiosity that will steer you towards learning all things about the dark side, even if the end result is insanity.
are searching for that “silver bullet” where you’ll be able to snap your fingers and life will magically fall into place. You’ll be disappointed; this is when the hard work starts, where you’ll have to roll up your sleeves and dive in. That’s because after an ego death there is a lot of integrating to reconfigure a new, more authentic you that encompasses whatever brutal truths you had been suppressing. Things that may help: Stoicism, and a book “The Path” by Michael Puett.
Let’s say, in spite of the warnings, you decide to induce a oneness NOSC and have a challenging experience. Hopefully you’re reading this blog post before you attempt to do that, so you can prepare beforehand.
In halfway houses, research shows that the best way to reduce recidivism is to get an agreement up front: this is who we are, this is how we operate, do you understand these conditions? For you to be able to stay here, you must abide by those conditions. If at any point you are in breach of these conditions, you acknowledge you will need to leave. You are perfectly free to stay or go, but you can stay only if you agree to abide by these conditions.
This is a much more effective system than not setting parameters up front, having people “break” rules they were not aware of or did not agree to, and trying to get people to change their behavior after the fact. Any SOP for peer counselors would have to follow this same spirit.
Those who choose to take psychedelics or use technology must agree beforehand to read the caveats above, and if they fit any of them, either they should not go through with inducing a NOSC or they must understand they could have a challenging experience.
If they choose to go through with inducing an experience, the location where they do this should be a safe haven for those having challenging experiences. The location should be supplied with things like:
Punching bags on the ground or anchored to a bench, with rolled up newspaper wrapped in duct tape where people can let loose physically and have an emotional release, scream, whatever.
Mats, towels, stuffed animals, whatever people may need to see them through a challenging situation.
Areas where counselors can work with people one on one, and quiet areas (or with meditative music) if they’re needed.
Agreements need to be set up beforehand. Those wanting to induce a NOSC experience must promise, no matter what happens, they will:
not leave the location.
see their experience through to some level of stabilization.
follow up after their experience, anywhere from days to a week later.
read through the caveats regarding the STER properties of Selflessness, Timelessness, Effortlessness, and Richness, as outlined in the book Stealing Fire.
Peer counselors should be able to give NOSC experiencers space and be non-judgmental - if NOSC experiencers need a hug, they can get a hug. If they want someone to talk to, they can do that. If they need space while being monitored, they can be left alone.
One last tip from the psychedelic side of things, from an expert: if you become untethered from your physical boundaries, focus on your breathing. That will help ground you back in the physical world.
This is a foundation. The alternative to this sort of a priori thinking and preparation is a harrowing experience like the one I underwent in 2002, and without an experienced guide, this could lead to institutionalization, calling the police, losing someone, etc. Luckily I popped out the other side intact.
Two other random points, for those who have popped into a oneness NOSC:
Over the years I’ve had extraordinary conversations with people that kicked “big me” into overdrive. Since reading Stealing Fire and coming out of the closet, I’ve asked people if they’ve experienced the same thing, and their answers are no so far. In the early days I would naively blurt out things like “you’re one of us”, but most likely, that isn’t true (unless you’re at Burning Man). So be careful about scaring people around you. Simply live your life and let them see the results.
Since women generally think more holistically and men tend to compartmentalize much better than women, do gender differences play into women’s versus men’s experience with a oneness NOSC. Do men need psychedelics more than women to get back into that state?
The other reason I popped into this state without technology or psychedelics is that I managed to blend thinking/feeling. I came into the world with strong intuitive skills and zero logical / analytical capabilities, and as child would impulsively blurt things out because I “knew” them. Dad would get exasperated and ask: why do you think this? What evidence is there?
This propelled me into technology, to correct this imbalance. Decades later I test equally as INFJ and INTJ (thinking/feeling). Those who can balance mind/intuition in this way may have a better chance of popping into a NOSC on their own, or managing it well if they induce a NOSC through technology or psychedelics.